{"id":3151,"date":"2016-08-22T20:34:44","date_gmt":"2016-08-23T02:34:44","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/?p=3151"},"modified":"2016-08-22T20:34:44","modified_gmt":"2016-08-23T02:34:44","slug":"today-went-according-to-a-different-plan","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/2016\/08\/22\/today-went-according-to-a-different-plan\/","title":{"rendered":"Today Went According to a Different Plan"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I haven&#8217;t heard anything back about the glasses thing, and I didn&#8217;t have time to even think about addressing the issue personally.  <\/p>\n<p>I also didn&#8217;t get anything done anywhere else, because I woke up to a Situation. <\/p>\n<p><!--more--><\/p>\n<p>The Situation unfolded confusingly, as these things do when you wake up to them: apparently, things happened, and we were needed to help with the purchase and setup of a smart-type phone, to replace the flip phone of a man who never really intended to replace the flip phone.<\/p>\n<p>This man is the father of a friend of ours, and one of his other children wants him to be more available for his grandkids.  This means video chatting, and fancy new technology.  <\/p>\n<p>This meant that we were called up to provide in person support from pre-purchase to post-purchase setup and education.<\/p>\n<p>I just woke up. I do not respond well to waking up. At all. There&#8217;s crankiness and queasiness and general bleh-ness. I need time for my systems to warm up and issue status reports before I can even begin to guess how the rest of the day might go. I request time to wake up. <\/p>\n<p>This likely makes everything that happens after that point my fault, somehow.<\/p>\n<p>We get picked up by the friend&#8217;s dad&#8211;we&#8217;re meeting the friend at the Sprint store, but not the Sprint store I&#8217;d been to previously. A smaller one in a different location entirely, with a much smaller stock. But that&#8217;s okay&#8211;we can work with what they have, and if nothing there satisfies, we&#8217;ll just wait for the friend to show up and maybe regroup and head to a differen&#8211;wait, I just got a text.<\/p>\n<p>Blowout. Waiting for tow truck. <\/p>\n<p>Well, shit.<\/p>\n<p>It doesn&#8217;t matter.  Hidden among the high-end flashy phones are some lower-cost Androids, including a LG that looks like it will be perfect for someone new to the whole &#8216;smartphone&#8217; concept.  A bit of investigation later [some Google searching, and a bit of poking around on the device itself], and&#8230;yup.  This looks like a good idea. <\/p>\n<p>I got the fuck out of the store while the contract renegotiation was going on, because there were wild children running and screaming and apparently this is just a big anxious-making thing for me.  I just cannot deal, so I go out and sit on&#8230;something I was probably not supposed to sit on.  It had a plaque identifying it as a bench, but it was displayed as an art piece.  <\/p>\n<p>I do not fucking care.  Plaque said bench. I sit.<\/p>\n<p>I calm down enough to go back in, just in time to provide my lovely Adonit Jot Pro so a signature can be provided on a tablet.  <\/p>\n<p>No, you cannot have my stylus, Sprint Store.  It is mine. <i>Mine.<\/i>  You should really look into stocking them, though, because your markup would probably be hilarious, and they really are pretty good.<\/p>\n<p>Things look to be done&#8211;all but the social stuff&#8211;so I return to the Probably Not For Sitting Bench until it&#8217;s time to get back into the van.  <\/p>\n<p>Our next stop? Dollar Tree, to peruse their surprisingly varied selection of cheap stylus options.  Because, really, fuck spending more than a dollar on a stylus.<\/p>\n<p>He opts for one that can also be used as a cat toy.  <\/p>\n<p>Gremlin opts for the candy aisle.<\/p>\n<p>I purchase a basket for a project I&#8217;m working on.<\/p>\n<p>And we head back to the dad&#8217;s house, to finish setting up everything he&#8217;ll need for this new phone.<\/p>\n<p>Step 1: Gmail.  <\/p>\n<p>Holy shit, are there just no usernames left. Even weird, obscure historical type names are taken.  <\/p>\n<p>Step 2: Facebook. <\/p>\n<p>Holy shit, setting up a Facebook account is annoying.<\/p>\n<p>Step 3: Skype.<\/p>\n<p>So, it turns out that setting up a Skype account with Facebook means that it&#8217;s unusable on a mobile device.  <\/p>\n<p>Abort Step 3.  Fuck Skype.  We are not going to bother with Skype right now.  Skype needs to fix their shit before Skype becomes an option.<\/p>\n<p>But we got everything set up, and taught him how to use the basic phone functions.  We showed him how to make a video call with Facebook Messenger.  <\/p>\n<p>A quick side-trip to MicroCenter for a 32gb microSD card for the phone, and we&#8217;re done.  <\/p>\n<p>Another person has been dragged into modernity.  <\/p>\n<p>I am exhausted.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I haven&#8217;t heard anything back about the glasses thing, and I didn&#8217;t have time to even think about addressing the issue personally. I also didn&#8217;t get anything done anywhere else, because I woke up to a Situation.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[145],"class_list":["post-3151","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bib","tag-real-life"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3bMfN-OP","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3151","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3151"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3151\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3152,"href":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3151\/revisions\/3152"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3151"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3151"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3151"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}