{"id":935,"date":"2008-12-07T16:47:07","date_gmt":"2008-12-07T23:47:07","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/main\/?p=935"},"modified":"2013-02-23T04:10:04","modified_gmt":"2013-02-23T04:10:04","slug":"oops-also-ow","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/2008\/12\/07\/oops-also-ow\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8230;.oops.  Also, ow."},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I don&#8217;t know why, but I woke up sick about twelve hours ago, and my second trip to the bathroom ended in badness.<\/p>\n<p>One minute, I was right where I belonged &#8212; on the toilet, wondering exactly how bad this was going to get.  The next&#8230;I don&#8217;t know, because there&#8217;s this missing instant between that and my face hitting the door in front of me.<br \/>\n<!--more--><br \/>\nAnd now my nice new shirt has a hole in it, where whatever it is that I cut myself on poked through to leave two ragged tears over my bellybutton.  And I&#8217;ve hit the &#8216;domestic-abuse-excuse&#8217; jackpot, since my face really <i>did<\/i> hit the door.  And it hurts a lot&#8230;.<\/p>\n<p>I hope I can do something about the shirt.  It was only $8, but I like it, and don&#8217;t want to have to toss it so soon.<\/p>\n<p>&#8230;maybe Kohl&#8217;s will have more when I&#8217;m ready to go back out where people can see me again.  <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I don&#8217;t know why, but I woke up sick about twelve hours ago, and my second trip to the bathroom ended in badness. One minute, I was right where I belonged &#8212; on the toilet, wondering exactly how bad this &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/2008\/12\/07\/oops-also-ow\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&rarr;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[1],"tags":[127],"class_list":["post-935","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-bib","tag-personal-injury"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3bMfN-f5","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/935","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=935"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/935\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1748,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/935\/revisions\/1748"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=935"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=935"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=935"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}