{"id":98,"date":"2005-10-19T15:06:36","date_gmt":"2005-10-19T21:06:36","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/main\/?p=98"},"modified":"2013-02-23T06:26:03","modified_gmt":"2013-02-23T06:26:03","slug":"mikey-the-snotard","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/2005\/10\/19\/mikey-the-snotard\/","title":{"rendered":"Mikey the SnoTard — A Happy Children’s Story"},"content":{"rendered":"

This is Mikey. He’s a GoTard. I made him out of Snow….
\nI guess that would make him a SnoTard.<\/p>\n

<\/center>Wave “Hi,” Mikey.
\nHe can’t really wave; his arm just beats ineffectively against his chest. He’s a SnoTard….<\/p>\n

<\/center>Aren’t the wheels on his wheelchair pretty?<\/p>\n

<\/center>Look! Mikey found the joystick! Go Mikey, go!<\/p>\n

<\/center>Mikey loves the outdoors. He gets to wear his special BaseBall Cap outside.<\/p>\n

<\/center>Look how happy Mikey the SnoTard is….<\/p>\n

<\/center>Hello down there Mikey. Are you looking up at me, or is that just your typical SnoTard headtilt?<\/p>\n

<\/center>It’s just your typical SnoTard head tilt….<\/p>\n

<\/center>Mikey’s happy. He says “Bwuah gaaaauuuuuurrr….”
\nWe have no idea what that means…but look how happy he is….<\/p>\n

<\/center>“Baaaaaabwuaaaah guh baaaarrrr!”<\/p>\n

<\/center>Mikey the SnoTard looks so happy. Even his big, innocent blue eyes looking out at us from under his special BaseBallCap\/SnoTard helmet are filled with the joys of SnoTardism….
\nWave Mikey. Wave.<\/p>\n

<\/center>OH MY GOD! YOU KILLED MIKEY!<\/p>\n

<\/center>And his eyes are still happy and innocent. Be free Mikey, be free!<\/p>\n

<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

This is Mikey. He’s a GoTard. I made him out of Snow…. I guess that would make him a SnoTard. Wave “Hi,” Mikey.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[23],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-98","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-with-images"],"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p3bMfN-1A","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/98","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=98"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/98\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":2084,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/98\/revisions\/2084"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=98"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=98"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.coffeechick.com\/words\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=98"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}