Glasses: Insomniac Interlude.

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As previously mentioned, I was at the VA yesterday for a bit of zap-and-measure. In my rush up to the second floor from the parking garage, I passed by the ‘Glasses’ office–more a closet, really, with an even smaller ‘waiting closet’ across the hall.

I noted the hours, and that the current time implied that it should be open.

It was not open.

It continued to be Not Open after my appointment.

I was to speak to Prosthetics instead–which worked out quite well, since I was already speaking to them about other things.

Everything has changed again.

Normal procedure for getting glasses after an eye exam–or, the procedure that I was used to:

Get them to write down your prescription, and get to the VA between certain erratic hours in hopes of being seen by the man in the Glasses Closet.

Once in, you were permitted to select from one of a dozen trays of generally bulky, terrible, heavy frames–the sorts of frames that certain subsets are currently going mad for, but would set off some rather nasty headaches for me. There were maybe two trays of ‘female’ frames, and most of them were not much better.

Glasses Man would write down the frames, the information from your prescription, and accept minimal requests for minimal features, depending on certain factors. Then, you would be sent off to wait for the glasses to arrive in the mail.

Adjustments would not happen. Rectification of fuckups would not happen. Fuckups meant you had to start over.


Well, I handed over my prescription, which was then stapled to two sheets of paper. One is a form for the store to fill out to request compensation up to a certain dollar amount. The second is a list of places they have dealt with before.

And here’s where my confusion starts.

The lady behind the counter said that those were the places I had to go to.

The sheet says that these are merely places they have worked with before.

The sheet also says that if the name of the store on my authorization does not match the name of the store submitting the request, the request will be denied.

The name of the store on my authorization is not on the list.

What is on the list?

  • Two shops that are closed on weekends.
  • At least two shops that have not existed for a year.
  • Twelve shops more than twenty miles away, of those, six are over 40 miles away, two are over sixty, and one is almost a hundred miles away.
  • Three are WalMarts, but, according to Mistress ListGiver, Only These WalMarts are Permitted, not the WalMart near me. No, I must drive ten to thirty miles to the Approved WalMart.

At this point, I’m planning on just going back to where I got my eye exam [because the name on this form must match the name on the HealthNet form] and trying it that way.

That’s assuming I manage to get any sleep tonight, because the entire thing is just…anxious-making.

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